Why a fashion designer?

Things are getting more interesting in my life. 

It's only the third day of the year, I have already written two blog posts. I don't know how I will continue this blog. The plan of closing down is blog is in my head. I have allocated too much time on writing blog instead of doing other stuff. Is writing this blog a waste of time?

I find myself loving the feeling of reading. Reading makes me rethink about myself. It's a really exhausting non physical activity. If a person constantly reads, she might not be able to live a life. I'm currently into this type of situation. I find it easier to just immerse myself into the world of words instead of the world of humans. Is that an obsession? Obsession can lead to a serious problem. People might not pay attention to other things any more. What they do will be plainly focusing on what they obsessed with. Yes, in my condition, I think it's too pitiful for me to be obsessed with things like that.

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Tell you a little testimony. It's a testimony of God shaping my character and my mind. You might find it a bit ridiculous, but bear with this testimony.

People who know me since I was young know that I have this little dream, which is becoming a fashion designer. It's easier to say than to be. As all of us know that fashion designer means to be popular, even more popular than the models. Popularity was what I looked for. No one knew that was my only purpose of being a fashion designer. Like other teens, I opted to have a prosperous life. A life that shines. I wanted a life like Taylor Swift who has her own shoes product line, I wanted a life like Gisele Bunche who engages with many brands and eventually comes out with her own shoe line too. I want to be like Coco Channel who changed the whole fashion industry until today. I wanted to be famous. I wanted the world knew about my name. 

I won't.

I was struggling with my parents when we discussed about my carrier path. They strongly disagreed with it. I knew why, but I stood still on my own position. 

That was when I knew how important my parents have been in my life. A life without them is a life that I can't even imagine. It would be totally a mess, a mess that I couldn't even think about it. 

I didn't change my ambition immediately. I stopped caring about it. And here comes my life path to a very 'business' one. I'm not sure is this a correct one, but I once told myself that I would do everything that's favourable in God. 

I stop seeking for popularity.
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