Social media

I like how some weird things going on when I'm involved in.

I like writing more than talking to people or playing piano.

Lately, I have been rethinking about my life and being. I realised there were too much positive thoughts in my brain, and I had to delete them forever. I'm too positive to thinking that I'm unique in the way I was born.

I realised how much I have changed throughout my whole teen life. I have become more outspoken. I'm now brave enough to speak English to Australians invigilators. I'm bold to admit my own mistakes and wrongs. I've dipped inside the network of social media. I have taken lots of photos of which I'm boastful about. I'm able to communicate with people.

Only then I realised I have become more and more low in self esteem. My elder sister pointed out this clearly. I felt like slapping myself when she talked to me. In the end, I cried like a baby. I've been crying for more than 2 days. I had no idea why I liked to cry so much. I sort out my crying problem, and get to know that I'm a person who has baby emotion with 18 years old body. 

I've been gaining attention from the social media. I've no idea since when my pride was built there. I took lots of nice photos to show how creative and how wonderful my editing skill are. I've spent most of my time looking at the phone. Well, I admit, till now I'm still obsessed with Youtube. I hope to get myself out of it in this time. 

It was a Youtube video woke me up. The video was summing up college student debt. The interviewees were asked if those money was worth spending for. The last interviewee said no. Because the memory of college was all about social media and gaming, sleeping inside the classroom while lecturers were teaching. This words woke me up.

Not only that, there was also my internal feeling of being mysterious. I thought I had been exposing myself to the public. This is kind of weird, like really weird. I can't afford to let people know my activities even before I personally tell them. I know, I'm literally doing it here on Blogger. But bear with me, I wish my blog can influence the future me. 

The next step I took was that I deleted my Instagram app. It was too much distraction. Then, I just realised deleting the account would be more appropriate. I deleted the account on my sister's phone. My memory of Instagram for almost 5 years had gone. My 500+ followers have gone and I'm permanently not following the 500+ people. The end.

Then, I thought it was great to delete my Facebook account too. Because Facebook has got too much interesting things to go through, which had made me spent more than an hour a day reading them. It was bad. Due to the lost contact concern, I told myself just to deactivate the account. So, I did what I thought. 

I hope I could enjoy the Instagram free days in the future. I wish to get back to my normal life (which supposed to be 7 years ago). Sometimes, life is too short for social media. 

I never know it can be this short.