The projection of music, every note played by the piano is clearly heard. All I want is to stay quiet in this little room. A room of mine. A room that I've been using since I was 11. I'm sitting on the floor, laptop on my laps. I feel so the noise, though there's only piano sounds played by my sister right outside the room.
I crave for food. I'm so hungry. I don't know how to stop the feeling of being hungry. I want to eat something. A something that I won't feel guilty eating it. The feeling is super bad. And I know, 30 minutes left till 7 p.m. I'm still here, fulfilling my desire of writing a blog post to share within the social media.
Every thought of mine, is like desire. They are making me to do things that my heart wants to do but my brain opposes it so aggressively. Often, I left the battle to my head and heart. By the moment I left, I know I'm not having logic or rational. Yes, my heart wins. It always wins the battles.
Like going out with my friends, ya, that's not a real big deal. Because it's super normal for a college student to do so. But I told myself, I shouldn't follow them. I spend more time studying and ace for my Ausmat. I know. But I don't know how to do it. Say no? If I say no, I'll feel sad. The depression is super high. What should I do?
How I wish I could, be a well rounded person. How I wish I wouldn't spend so much time in social media. The reason of spending too much time in social media is a significant of loneliness. And loneliness is... being alone.
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