Bleed

Good evening? Or perhaps Good night! 

I've not been updating my blog for a long time. I wouldn't like saying it "updating", because it feels like I'm forced to do something. So, I've not been writing my blog for a long time.

People always ask me about what I miss about in Sarawak ( my hometown ). I often say my old friends and the beaches, sunsets, and the warmth of Foo Chow language. It's not too much if I say I miss the innocent of the people there. 

I miss the innocent me and the Bintulu, Sarawak people. Their thoughts of sharing love with their friends and the way they love the people around them are what I hardly find in here, Peninsular Malaysia. I miss it very much.

The way i help you because you are my friends, and vice versa. It's so nice. If the action of love of them is drawn in a picture, I'll never hesitate to buy that picture, looking at it every night, instead of writing a blog post. That's so nice! 

What do I love about the things here, Peninsular Malaysia?

The clothes shops here, the excess here and also the fast momentum here. You'll ask - Friends? I'll say, yes, maybe two or three. To be honest, I'm never a country person. I like the developed city but with greener looks. I would like to live in a city, but not a country.

I enjoy shopping the most in Peninsular Malaysia. Walking in and out the shops in the mall, checking price tags, struggling which one to buy, being tired of walking in the mall. Though I'm short of money, still I love walking in the mall and enjoying the smell of fashion and style. It's full of colours.

Recently I've too much uneasy decisions to make. 

For example: 

My classmates keep being absent in school. The revision exercise paper that teachers giving are like tons of them. Teachers, who are being helpful and high in expectation, expect us ( the ones who present ), help the absents to keep the paper and stuffs like that. I know being a friend of my classmates should be helpful. But it's really hard for me to do this everyday! Seriously, everyday! 

I'm not sure if I'm irresponsible. I feel so remorseful and feel like killing myself like that after has decided not to keep for them. At last, I keep(kept). 

It's like people taking advantages on me. I'm frustrated. I'm sure I shouldn't be frustrated. I can't help it.

The world is too old for me, and the world is bleeding.

Elisa Jean

11:50 p.m 

3/9/14

FRI