That little dream.

"What is your biggest fear?"

"Animals." 

No, I reckon I have more than one fear, the fear of being unsecured, abandoned. All these, I call them loneliness. 

The feeling of being away from the safest area, isolated by others. The feeling that makes you want to flee away from wherever to somewhere you call the safe paradise. 

I seek for securities whenever I go. I realise whenever I go jogging alone, I insist myself bringing that super flat yet bulky phone of mine on my hand. I always have it on my hand. It's the fear of losing contact with the big world in my phone that attaches my phone with my hand. I, therefore, end up jogging with the phone on my hand unchanging for more than 20 minutes. Whenever I feel like giving up, I will unlock my phone home screen and checking if there is any exciting notification. It is as if I'm consuming energy bar from my phone. Or to be exact, the little world in my phone. 

There are a lot of times, you (yes it's you) feel super awkward in a party or perhaps small group talk, you start to panic. Then, here comes your phone, the little world that you can participate in, and never feel awkward. You search your phone through any where. That instance when you recognise the familiar shape, you gentle take it out. Then, you find yourself swiping the phone screen.

Soon, you realise you have the contradicting feelings when you play your phone. You kind of want to pull yourself away from the phone but there is this invisible force that pulls you back, as if it whispers to you in a deep, calming voice - don't be scared, I'm here.

Yea, we always need someone, or something to accompany us. That's the reason why we are so desperately thinking of getting our true-one, hunting he or she like a hungry eager which is weary and has starved for 5 days. 

***

Yea, I wish there was someone to turn up to my face and whisper to me just like how my phone whispers to me,  

"Dear, don't be scared, I'm here."

***

Yea, that little dream.